Meeting His Parents                   Back to HOME

"Would you like to meet my parents?" Gulp.
Meeting his family for the first time can be more nerve-racking than going on your first date. What if they don’t like me? What if I don’t like them? What if I say something wrong? These and many more questions will be flying around your head. Don’t worry we have some useful tips for surviving the introduction with your in-laws.

First Impressions matter
Go girl! This guy must be serious if he wants you to meet his parents. But remember first impressions are very important. If his parents take a disliking to you on your first encounter they may never accept you and if they do it could take a long time.

Get wise
Find out as much as you can about his family by asking him questions about them such as, has there been any recent deaths that you could avoid. The last thing you want is to tell them that you want to diving if his uncle has just been eating by a shark. (I know it isn't likely but it is just hypothetical OK.) And if you know that his parents are very conservative, you may want to cover up that tattoo or temporarily remove that nose ring - or at least have your partner warn them of your body art - before meeting them.

Until you have got to the point of calling them mum an dad try to steer clear of any family disputes or differences of opinions. Keep
Long before you meet his parents, talk with your boyfriend about what he wants out of the visit, letting him share what to address and avoid. "He needs to prepare you and support you there.

Think of questions you would like to ask them. After all it is not just about them liking you, you also have to like them they could be your future in-laws. Talk about current events, and target their interests or careers.

Houseguest etiquette
If you are staying at their home for a night or a few days show them a token of appreciation by offering them a bouquet of flowers or a potted plant.
Take a bottle of wine to dinner (check with your partner that they drink first. They might be recovering alcoholics and you don’t want to get them back on the bandwagon do you?)

If you are a vegetarian make sure you let them know before hand. Make sure you EAT all or at least most of your dinner. You don’t want to offend them.

Most important don’t over do the booze. The last thing you want to do is get drunk and slag off his mother’s cooking.

Where to sleep
Although the two of you may share a bed when you're on home turf, while at his parents' place, they might not go for that sort of thing so do respect his parents’ wishes. (Well at least until they are a sleep then sneak into his room for a quickie. But make sure you don’t fall a sleep in his bed or you may get caught and that won’t do you any good when trying to score some brownie points.)

What if they hate me?
Keep in mind that his parents are just as anxious as you are and that they will be thinking exactly the same questions.
While it's normal to want to be popular with potential in-laws, be open to the fact that you may not "click." Do not expect to build an instant bond with them, but instead try to help them be at ease with you, opening the door for a warm encounter the next time you get together.

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